The new episode of Shared Care is a conversation about childcare assistance, which helps the kindergarten and also organizes the team not only in a professional aspect, but also by maintaining the network that takes care of the employees. Our guest is Deriya Uruch, director of the Shtastlivo detstvo kindergarten, Kornitsa village.
https://open.spotify.com/episode/3F2MLmK5nfCugo3v7F8c8z
Transcript in English
Hello! You are in the Shared Care podcast, in which we talk about supporting people who care for children in the family, for the elderly, for sick relatives and balancing work and care responsibilities. The podcast is part of the CAREdiZO project, which aims to create family-friendly policies and, in particular, to participate in the caregiving of people, emphasizing the value of care in society as a whole. Today we have with us the director of Shtastlivo detstvo kindergarten, Kornitsa village, Deriya Uruch, with whom we will talk about care as a job and how an organization like a kindergarten supports people to have both a professional and a personal life, especially when they have to take care of someone at home.
- Good afternoon!
- Hello, good afternoon! I am extremely pleased to be here!
- So, care is your professional responsibility. In the kindergarten, you and your colleagues, your team take care of young children, educate them, train them. Can you tell us a little more about your work and responsibilities there?
- Yes, first of all, care. The kindergarten is dedicated to care - care for the little person. Care for the most precious thing for all of us - these are our children.
Extremely, hugely, I would say, responsible. Responsibility as a job. Demanding a lot of dedication. Demanding a lot of love. It is something that you have to have in yourself to give easily to children, because they very easily and quickly understand when you are genuine, how dedicated you are to your work. They understand it very quickly.
Our kindergarten is quite old, almost 50 years old now. Years ago it had a lot more children than today. If years ago it was up to 100-130 children, now we have 80-90. We are moving in this range. This is a consequence of the departure of most young people in the country. This is the consequence - yes, there are fewer children in kindergarten, which is so sad for us as a kindergarten, because we are happy - the more children, the happier we are.
And I remember that an old man said that as long as you have a kindergarten and a school in the village, the village will keep live too. And he is absolutely right, because these are the the things that hold the village. In order for it to exist, there must be a kindergarten and a school.
- Is there a separate nursery, kindergarten?
- Well, the kindergarten has 4 groups. It starts from the first age group to the fourth age group. We don't have a nursery age, a nursery group. The children are from 2-3 years old in the first group, the second group is 3-4 years old, 5 years old. The third group is 4-5-6 years old, the fourth is 6-7 years old. In principle, they are always mixed. Rarely in the years we have had,.... when we have only one group of this and that set. That's how it happens, in principle.
- And how many families do you support, taking care of their children? Maybe a family with a father, with a mother, maybe single parents, or children who are cared for by a grandmother, grandfather. Because, as you already said, in the village there are many cases in which the parents leave or at least, during part of the year, work somewhere abroad. Maybe such children are left in the care of the grandmother and grandfather.
- This is a very common occurrence, I would say, or rather a problem. Often, children of young parents who go abroad are raised by their older parents and they come to us in kindergarten. I notice that while they are in kindergarten, the children are looked after by their grandparents. At the moment when the child starts first grade, the grandparents say, "we are here because we do not have the support of the kindergarten, because until now the child was served, cared for in kindergarten all day, daily, while now in school, school is becoming more complicated and we were here," so many of the children, after kindergarten, go abroad to their parents.
There are rare cases when the parents have returned to Bulgaria, it is often the case that the children are taken from their parents abroad, because the older ones, the grandparents, cannot take care of them at school age.
- The kindergarten itself is an important part, as an infrastructure, supporting parents who also want to work. How do you see your role in your community for these parents?
- Well, we are, how to say, a partner, an outlet, an opportunity that parents rely on completely for care, for support, for the trust that we need to build as an institution with parents.
The moment when you leave your child and they say, ... even I have cases when the child is not yet two years old, in several such cases the mother comes and says "I have to start work right away, there is no one to look after my child. Can you make a compromise and take my child away from me before he turns two?", for example two weeks or a month before he turns two, "... because my employer needs such a person now and if I don't start now, I'm missing out on this job opportunity." I always put myself in their shoes and say to myself - "of course, now is the time to lend a hand and take care of her in his most needy moment." Because such people have to rely on us. There is no one else. They have no older parents, no one to leave her with. Now is the moment when she has a job opportunity. I can think of a specific case, that's what she said. The woman had to start in some medical center, I remember. And she said, "Please, now is the time to take my child... one month left until he turns two. I know what the rules are in the kindergarten, that you take the children from the age of two. But if you can help me now at this moment."
I always make the compromise, I take the child, because a month more or less, or two and five, however long it takes, we always take care of the child, because I know how important it is for such a young person to start working somewhere. Always from their side, as time passes, I feel the gratitude. I hear it. I see it. A year later, when we had made this gesture, I would say, to this mother, she came to me several times, thanked me, said "Ma'am, it's good that you are here, because I would have lost my job. There was no way I could take it on if it weren't for you, the kindergarten, taking my child on at this moment, looking after him."
And also that the time range is the full-day care that the kindergarten provides. This is extremely important. From 8 in the morning, even from 7.30 we are there, we take the children until 5.30, until 6.30 in the evening the child is even under the care and attention of the kindergarten staff.
That is, the parent has such peace of mind, certainty that the child is in the right place, in the right care, he is fed, served, and trained. Of all that the institution offers, the kindergarten in general is a huge asset and I think that Bulgaria is one of the few countries that has this opportunity. And parents should appreciate what they have. I think they do, at least the majority. They appreciate the care of the kindergarten and education in general, for the Ministry of Education, for making the kindergarten accessible at all, because it is also free now, so it is accessible to everyone. If it was once accessible to certain people, because there were also people who could not afford to send their child to kindergarten because they could not afford the fee. I know such parents, such people. But now, fortunately, I will say it again, it is a great wealth for this great opportunity for your child to be cared for all day, fed and educated ..., educated in the kindergarten institution. And parents really appreciate this opportunity.
- This is wonderful, because in your person we can also see a partnership with parents who want to work. Since you mentioned this case in which the mother had to start working, let us emphasize that there are fewer jobs in a rural municipality. These parents probably also have to travel to work.
So your assistance here is invaluable for such parents. We need to look at it from their perspective about having to leave for work earlier in the morning or return later in the evening. Or to know that they leave their child in your hands for the whole day and even if something happens, they rely on you while they are at work, for example 30-40 km away. Which is great. And for comparison, I will give this example, many parents in Sofia, for example in big cities, where there are no kindergartens, cannot count on such support. So partnership is something very important.
- You are absolutely right. That's right. You mentioned the trips. We are 15 km away in Kornitsa from Gotse Delchev. In terms of time, it is 30 minutes. About 30 minutes is the destination. But a small settlement has many advantages when there is a kindergarten there. First, the number of children in the group is much smaller. When teachers, pedagogical and non-pedagogical staff work with fewer children in a group. The care is much higher. That is, the time that the staff can devote to each child is much greater, and more valuable. More qualitatively, I would say.
- We are talking about the partnership between the kindergarten and the parents. And let's look at this partnership from the other side, more aimed at fathers, at men. Because our project CAREdiZO is also related to encouraging men to be more active in caring for their children at home, let's call this not help, but more active involvement in all these caring responsibilities. What is your role, the kindergarten, in this sense? How do you see the participation of men, of fathers, in raising children? And how do you encourage such a
active involvement of fathers?
- A very good question. Fathers are definitely the more passive part of everyday life in kindergarten, in general with children. But we are exploring all kinds of opportunities and initiatives to include dads to be closer to kindergarten, to their children. We are coming up with all kinds of activities. Now I am thinking of the road safety activity, for example, when they take on the role of a policeman, show how to ride bikes with their children, participate in some competitions together, some competitive ones, other activities in which we have included fathers, for example, we invite fathers to come to kindergarten, present their profession, get to know the children in the group and tell about themselves and what they do. For example, we had a father who was a craftsman by profession, he works, that's his job. He comes with his tools, the screwdriver, the hammer, the adze, other materials, there the whole suitcase that was brought to the kindergarten, he showed, he told. The children were very interested, they wanted to touch, try, press the screwdriver, how it works. Together with the children, they assembled birdhouses, it was very interesting. They assembled them, then mounted them on the trees outside and they are still there today, by the way, the houses are there and decorate our kindergarten yard. For the future, we set it as a goal to continue in this direction. For example, we have invited dads to come and read some book to the children in the group, a fairy tale. Another thing has happened that impresses us, for example, when children are brought to the kindergarten by their fathers, they part with them more easily, they don't cry as much. Somehow, when the father says "Come on, go now, without too much pampering" and the child does not allow himself to be pampered as much as when the mother takes him to kindergarten. I tell them a hundred times, I recommend that the father takes the child to kindergarten in the morning, because somehow the separation from the father is easier. So it strikes me that lately quite a few fathers, if not the majority of fathers, take their child to kindergarten in the morning, which is very nice for us too.
- Great initiatives, wonderful work, as you say, you do for the children. But let's now look at the people who are standing on the other side. Your team, those who take care of the little children. Can you tell us about your team, how many people work, what commitments you have daily or how the care work in the kindergarten happens?
- Yes, of course. The team is like a mirror of the kindergarten. When you see the team or rather when you see its work, this is actually the kindergarten. If the team is complete, if the team is calm, if the team is satisfied, if it is happy, if he gets this, he will be happy, he will be complete. Complete in his work for the children. It will be the best for the children.
I always strive to direct things in such a way, to organize my team in such a way that I get the best out of them. I know that he will get the best out of his team when the team is calm first of all, satisfied with its work, appreciated. And if he gets all this, he will give his best. My team is not big. We are a small team, I would say. The whole team is about 15-16 people, pedagogical and non-pedagogical. Knock on wood, I am very confident in my team. I know them to such an extent that I can understand at any moment what is happening with this person, how he feels. Is he calm, is he restless, is something bothering him, does he want to tell me something.
And I have let them in so that they never feel cramped, come knock on the door and ask for whatever they need. You have to be very careful not to leave any loose ends. Because you have to be understanding, and you have to not become too liberal and let go of the loose ends. Because others will react. And that's why I always say - "Yes, great, go, do your job, but then you'll stay". No problem going at a time when you have to go somewhere, wherever it may be, whether it's for a parent-teacher meeting. Now it happened to me, the day before yesterday, one of the assistant teachers says, "Madam, I have to go, my child is in first grade, I have to go to school for a parent-teacher meeting. So how? Of course, you will go! No problem. You will go, then you will work, you will get back the time there, half an hour or an hour that you were gone". Because the attention of the others, the rest of the staff, is immediately heightened. - And how come she's going there now? Then she has to get it back or something like that. And we have to talk to people very clearly and openly. I want us to talk things out here and now.
We sit down and say who needs what, why does he need it so much. If a compromise is made, why will we make it a compromise. Everything should be open. It shouldn't happen behind the other person's back. Because usually people, when someone has shared it only with you, and the other person doesn't know about it and he thinks who knows what, now they have agreements there. Actually, at all
It's not like that. When things are open, shared, somehow everyone becomes more or less involved.
There's no such... It doesn't create tension between the team when everything is open. There's no need for such backstage games.
- Is it difficult for your employees to combine work, because this is a very specific job? This is a job where you can't say, I'm going to leave kindergarten or childcare today. And here we have a more specific moment. It's not something that's on the computer and you can leave it, for example, for tonight or another time. How do you combine this responsible work, which does not tolerate hesitation, with care?
Because, as you said, someone is a parent, someone has elderly parents or sick ones. Are they coping? You've observed that.
- Yes, this is our everyday life, realistically speaking. It's very important to share, I said it a moment ago, to share, to tell about yourself, to tell others about the problems you have. We have a colleague who has a child with special educational needs. For example, every time she has to take more leave, she has to be absent more often. We have talked about this with colleagues at our meetings and they are absolutely familiar with the colleague's family situation. And when you are familiar with a given problem, with a given case, i.e. not by your own will, not because you don't feel like working or not because you want to mess around, but simply because that's how it happened, but simply because that's your fate, you are so lucky to have such a child in the case that I was going to talk about. Colleagues always treat the given colleague with understanding, and so do I. Because there is no way that everything can be neat, everything can be correct. Many times, when she has to take her child to a specialist, for example, to a psychologist, to TELK examinations, committees there or whatever else is necessary, she always shares it in advance. We make a plan, a reorganization of work. When she is absent, who will replace her. She uses her vacation, if she doesn't have vacation, she makes up another day, when another colleague has to be absent for some other reason, between them, but also with me, there is understanding between them. They seem to understand each other, they share their problems and understand each other.
I always tell them that this is an extraordinary wealth that we have as interpersonal relationships in the team. Very valuable. Very valuable for understanding, for empathy, to be empathetic to the colleague next to you, to understand him, to step into his shoes, so to speak. Because it is very easy to say - "I don't care, save yourself". But this is not how you build a team, this is not how you build a collective. This all happens with understanding, but sharing is very important. If you manage to share your problems, I believe that everyone would understand you. But if you don't share your problems, there is no way that the others will understand you. If you are worried, or ashamed, or don't want others to know about your problems, this would lead to misunderstanding. Here the role of the manager as a leader is very important, as even a team psychologist, if that's what it takes, right? Absolutely.
Well, in every team, the leader is of enormous importance. He leads the dance, so to speak. Because if the leader is in a non-understanding, more aggressive mood...
I now remember that a nurse recently shared how she wanted to have a second child. And how her employer told her - "But I don't care at all, I don't need such pregnant women here!" A terribly ugly statement.
That is, how important it is when the leader, the employer, is also understanding, who can guide, lead his team in a positive, understanding way. He is the person who should even suggest his colleagues, his team. He must instill in his colleagues understanding for others, for those who are different, for those who are in need. Because at some point each of us has a need. If today one person needs to be considered by the TELK committee, or to take his child to the doctor, tomorrow another has a completely different need, but very similar. That is, in each of my colleagues I see at different times the need to be understood, to be helped. Everyone has such a need. At different times, but everyone has it.
- Here we see the team as an environment that helps the caregiver. It is very important to have such an understanding, sharing team.
- Absolutely. There is no way for a person to provide care, whatever it may be, if someone else does not take care of him. If the others approach him with misunderstanding, with non-partnership, they should not put themselves in a position, because everyone, for some reason, in order to take care of someone, someone else must first take care of him. That is, if an employer does not allow or does not organize things in such a way that he gets the free time to learn to perform some care, he will not be able to perform this care.
That is, things are closed. We must have understanding in every situation, have empathy.
- This is also building a culture, of supporting care. Although you are in a kindergarten, can you give advice, valuable solutions, conclusions that you have reached in the process of working with your team, in small companies, in
small organizations? What could they do, because maybe they don't have teams, human resources like in big companies, because maybe they don't have big budgets. But there are things that work. What are the valuable tips that you would share with such employers and teams?
- I understand. You know, I had a very hard time finding a quality person. A person who is dedicated to their job. To be good at their job, to be good at their job. To love their job. Well, just to... It's so hard, especially for me as an employer, it's been very hard for me to find the person who is not just looking for a job, but maybe also has the qualities to do it. And when you find such a person, he is extremely valuable. Extremely valuable. And every employer should strive to keep him. Because it's very hard to find... today to find a capable person, knowledgeable, who can do, who can... succeed.
And when you find such a person with a desire, that it just comes from within, that things work out for him, that he can do it and that they happen, you as an employer have to find all kinds of opportunities and ways to keep him. And because this is a great value. Today's resource, human resources, is a very great value.
A quality resource. I would say quality human resources, right? This is a great wealth and if I as an employer, when I find such a valuable resource, I strive to keep it. And in order to keep it, I have to understand it.
I have to make it convenient, flexible working hours for him, if necessary. Now we in the kindergarten can't afford it much, but since you asked me about small businesses or institutions, they can already do these things there. This is very valuable advice for every organization, for every team, because by feeling the value of employees and feeling the team as a true value, we can show empathy for their needs, their responsibilities, and care, and this can contribute to their emotional and physical well-being in the family and at the same time contribute to the professional development of the employees themselves, as well as to the organization.
- Really very valuable advice. All the things you told us during this episode were very interesting and I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for including you.
- I also thank you very much. It was so very pleasant for me to tell about the daily life of the kindergarten, about our life in the kindergarten.
- I hope that our listeners also found it so interesting. Expect us again in the next episode of the Shared Care podcast. Natasha Zarankova was with you..
The podcast was created by the National Business Development Network under the project CAREdiZO - CARE Driven Innovation for Gender mainstreaming in Home, Micro-Enterprises & Micro-CSOs, funded by the European Union within the framework of the "Citizens, Equality, Rights and Values " - CERV programme.
The CAREdiZO project is implemented in the framework of the European Commission’s CERV Programme, as a cooperation among the following organisations: Challedu (Greece), WHEN (Greece), MOTERU INFORMACIJOS CENTRAS (Lithuania), NATSIONALNA MREZHA ZA BIZNES RAZVITIE (Bulgaria), Mediterranean Institute of Gender Studies (Cyprus).. The project is funded by the European Union. The views and opinions expressed are, nonetheless, solely those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the European Commission-EU. Neither the European Union nor the European Commission is responsible for them. Project code: 101191047 – CAREdiZO – CERV-2024-GE.